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10 Ways Dads Can Connect with Their Children
Tips for Being an Involved Parent By Gwen Morrison
"Involved fathering is good; connected fathering is even better," says Ken Canfield, president and founder of the National Center for Fathering in Kansas City, Mo. "Research shows that a strong link between a father's involvement in his child's life and the stability of that child's values, personality and conduct."
Children whose fathers are actively present in their daily lives are known to demonstrate positive personality traits, such as increased self-control, greater cognitive abilities and increased empathy. Canfield agrees, saying that these children are also more likely to have solid marriages later in life.
David C. Dollahite, Ph.D., professor of family life at Brigham Young University in Provo, Utah, has learned through his vast research with fathers that the majority of dads believe that their work as a father is among the most important they do. "I have also found that most fathers strongly desire to be the best dads they can be and want to improve as fathers," he says.
Dollahite offers these tips to fathers, as part of a wish list he created for fathers who want to improve as dads.
- Establish and maintain a deep personal commitment to the well-being of your children, and make your children the priority they should be.
- Make the tough choices required to give your children as much of you as possible.
- Spend fun and enjoyable time with your children – laugh and smile often.
- Take them to new places, help them learn new skills and introduce them to new ideas.
- Remember that children spell love T-I-M-E.
- Frequently and enthusiastically communicate to your children that you are proud of them.
- Be present at the important "firsts" and other meaningful events in your child's life.
- Remember that most often "quality" time happens after sufficient "quantity" time.
- Listen more than you speak; encourage more than you direct.
- Continually communicate your deep and growing love for your children no matter how old they are.
