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Bonding From the Beginning

Use Baby's Senses to Create That Special Connection

By Kelly Burgess

When each of my three children was born, I couldn't get over how perfect they were. I wanted to kiss their tiny hands and feet, stroke their wrinkled little backs, bury my nose deep into their damp little necks and inhale that incomparable baby smell. I soon learned that what pleased me didn't necessarily please my babies.

It has been noted that babies are often very alert right after birth, then sleep quite a bit for a couple of days. After that, it seems as if sensory overload kicks in, and Baby begins to communicate in the only way he or she can: by crying. This can be a difficult time for a parent, particularly a mother already exhausted by childbirth, but there are ways to "read" your baby's signals and learn to comfort her or encourage her development without overwhelming her.

Often, initial bonding information focuses on touch and sight, but babies actually use all of their senses to learn about you.

– Newborns have poor vision, but what vision they do have is perfectly suited to the most important need in their new little worlds: feeding. When you feed your baby, whether by breast or bottle, his face is naturally about 10 inches from your own, which is the distance a newborn's eyes can focus – although just for a few minutes. Gradually, that time and distance lengthens, and Baby will soon begin to reach for you and try to touch your familiar face. Allow him or her to explore your face, being careful to keep sharp little fingernails trimmed.

– Touch is very important, because, according to A. Christine Harris, Ph.D., of Sacramento, Calif., a newborn's sense of smell and touch are as important to bonding as sight. Harris, a professor of psychology at Consumnes River College and author of Baby's First Year Journal: A Day-to-Day Guide to Your Baby's Development During the First Twelve Months

Want to see more?

• BabyFace Album
• Talk about it!
• Brain Builders: Stimulating Activities for Your 1-Month-Old Baby
• Family Energy Magazine
• Bonding for Life: Developing That Special Connection With Your Baby
• The First Year: Birth to 3 Months

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