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Bonding for Life

Develop a Connection with Baby

By Lyn Mettler

When 32-year-old Mary Sadlier of Rumford, R.I. was pregnant with her daughter Caitlyn, her husband, Stephen Rosa, regularly read entire books to the baby including the classic Green Eggs and Ham. Right after Caitlyn was born by Cesarean section, Rosa went over to the baby and started reciting lines from the book.

"I'm lying there on the table and I can hear him saying 'Sam I am,'" says Sadlier. "She was so soothed by the familiar refrains that she immediately stopped crying."

Though he may not have realized it, Rosa was already bonding with his newborn child, beginning a lifelong process that experts say will have amazing benefits for them both.

For most parents, bonding with their baby is not something they do consciously. It's in the tone of their voice, the gentle stroke on the skin and the soft melody they hum. But aware or not, bonding is one of the most important things parents can do for their children.

According to Roni Leiderman, executive director and associate dean of the Family Center at Nova Southeastern University in Ft. Lauderdale, Fla., babies are born with billions of brain cells that are not yet connected or networked. "Connection occurs according to the experiences you provide your child," she says.

By repeating quality experiences like reading or singing, parents can help these events become a permanent part of their newborn's brain, allowing them to develop both mental and emotional intelligence. Leiderman says that EQ, or emotional intelligence, is just as important as IQ, as EQ helps children develop empathy, trust, self-esteem and relationship skills.

Want to see more?

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• Attachment Parenting: Instinctive Care
• Reasons to Read to your Baby
• Introducing Music to your Baby
• Sing and Play with Your Baby

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